Prayer Part I: Praying for Something

If you were brought up in a devout family, you were taught to pray. You prayed at bed time and meal time. You went to church on Sunday and prayed. You God-blessed everyone on your list. Maybe you overheard your parents praying for a sick relative and you joined in. Praying came naturally.

Until it didn't.

As an adult, maybe you realized that you don’t really pray any more, certainly not with the natural faith of a child. Maybe you grew out of thinking that God could fix everything from Uncle Charlie’s alcoholism to the weather on the day of your school picnic. Maybe you decided that such prayer was really for children. Or maybe you know your heart so well that you've decided you aren't worthy to pray, that God might have issues with you.

But some people pray. You've seen them on television, in movies, in art, even at church. People ask you to pray for them. People interviewed at the scenes of disaster ask for prayers. Survivors of violence say it was prayer that got them through. It’s everywhere, so why is it so hard?

I have access to a religious library run by the Sisters of Saint Joseph of Carondelet. All books are sorted by subject: Bible Study, Feminist Theology, Labyrinth, Memoirs, etc. By far, most of the books in this one-room library are about prayer. People want to pray. People think they don’t know how.

I write about this not because I’m any sort of expert on prayer but because I have a bothersome need to pray and I believe you might have the same. Let’s start with the basics.

Praying For Something

In the Episcopal Church, our Book of Common Prayer (BCP) is a bounteous collection of prayers. It is impossible for me to write about prayer apart from this wonderful book. I suspect, however, that many of us don’t use it to its fullest. There are prayers for just about any kind of intention (a sick child, people at sea) and any sort of occasion (marriage, burial, ordination) and, of course, morning and evening prayer. These last two, also called the Daily Office, are used by clergy and laity alike…hence the “common” in Book of Common Prayer.

As a structured person, I love the Daily Office. The democracy of it also rings a bell; the Presiding Bishop and I are saying the same Daily Office. No elite prayers for her, no lesser ones for me. I love that the BCP lists readings of Scripture and Psalms for every single day in a two year cycle.  It’s a chance to “cover” the Bible bit by bit. I am a regular reader of the Daily Office but occasionally, I will depart from the prescribed prayers and read from the order for Matrimony or Burial or Baptism. As the Spirit moves me. Why wait until someone dies to pray “I know that my Redeemer liveth”?

All the prayers in the BCP are prayers for something. This is the method of prayer from our childhood, and it is not to be overlooked in adulthood. We ask God for a blessing, a favor, his attention, forgiveness…something. And they are all beautiful. Some are breathtakingly beautiful. We pray-ers are most comfortable and familiar with this kind of prayer.

Reciting written prayers is the standard practice of most Christians. The habit of praying daily is one to be fed and treasured. It gives shape to the day. It sets a Godly tone for the moment at hand and signals a blessed and peaceful rest when the day is done. Praying for something is very concrete. The words of the prayer guide you and, to the extent that you mindfully pray them, will clarify your purpose and will certainly turn your heart to God. Consider the Lord’s Prayer. Just the first two words are enough to knock you silly. “Our Father”. Imagine! God is my father. More than that, he is your father. What does that make us?

If you feel you should pray, that is a grace. That is God calling you to prayer. If you feel shy about it, pray to be able to pray. Yes, that's right. It is absolutely fair and acceptable to pray for the grace to pray. It sounds like asking the teacher for the answers to the exam ahead of time, but, trust me, praying to pray is a done thing. It is an act of humility and love.

So take up your prayer book. If you don’t think you can manage the Daily Office, say one prayer a day. Whatever you might have read about Thomas Merton, Julian of Norwich, C.S. Lewis, Evelyn Underhill or any other mystic you can name, be very sure that they had a habit of daily recited prayer. Even that rock star Pope Francis will be found with his Daily Office morning and night. I would bet anything.

In conclusion: one of my favorites from the BCP:

O God of peace, who has taught us that in returning and rest we shall be saved, in quietness and confidence shall be our strength: By the might of your Spirit lift us, we pray, to your presence, where we may be still and know that you are God; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Next time: Praying for Nothing: Meditation